I was expecting my first baby! My due date was January 18th....many more weeks to go. But, I awoke that morning feeling less than stellar. My stomach was tight and cramping. As I dressed for work, I remember telling my husband that something just didn't "feel right"....I even called my doctor at home, interrupting his breakfast, and told him I was feeling sorta strange. He told me he had an early surgery, but to go on into the office when it opened and wait for him there....just to check things out.
My husband was a bit put out when I asked him to accompany me to the doctor's office, but he phoned work and told them he would be in a bit late. Then we headed off to wait for Dr. Dawson at his office.
His sweet nurse, Cindy, was surprised to see us. When I told her how I felt, she teased me and said she bet I was having bladder spasms. We laughed about it, but she had me lay down in the exam room to wait for the doctor. That's when all hell broke loose....
As I was lying there, I felt a gush of warm liquid. Mortified to think that I had just wet myself, I jumped up from the exam table and blood went everywhere! Cindy came running when she heard my screams. Things happened so quickly....yet, somehow, to me, it all seemed to be happening in slow motion. She literally lifted me back onto the exam table, barking out orders to the other staff to call the doctor in surgery, call an ambulance, run down the hall to an other obstetrician's office and get help. Then she lowered my head, pulled my knees up to my stomach and laid across them to keep me in this position.
It goes without saying that I was in a state of panic....and shock. I was hemorrhaging badly. The doctor from down the hall arrived first, took one look at the situation and refused to touch me. All he would say was "She's miscarrying." Dr. Dawson's P.A., who was with him surgery, ran across the street from the hospital, arriving at the same time as the paramedics. He helped them get an IV in my arm and rode with me in the ambulance around the block to the emergency room entrance, where the doctor was waiting for me.
Nurses started cutting off my clothes and Dr. Dawson told me he wanted to try to get an ultrasound to see if the placenta was still attached. He listened to the baby's heartbeat....it was distressed, but still strong enough to do this. As I lay there, I felt another gush of liquid and an unexplainable desire to push. When I told him this, he did a cervix check and I had already almost fully dilated. He looked at me calmly, this doctor who had taken care of my mother when she was pregnant with me and had known me all my life, and said that there would be no delaying it....the baby had to be delivered immediately.
There was a great flurry of activity as they rushed me to the operating room. As I lay there, shaking uncontrollably, everyone telling me not to push, one of the nurses held my hand and smoothed my hair, trying to comfort me. The anesthesiologist told me to start counting backwards from 100...and the last words I heard the nurse say were "You will have another baby, sweetie....". As I drifted under, my only thoughts were that I had lost my baby.
When I surfaced from that dark, muffled place, Dr. Dawson was standing over me, holding my hand. He was smiling. I wondered how he could be smiling.....all I could feel was a deep sense of loss as the nurse's words immediately filled my mind. I could not find my voice....
"Jane, wake up....you have a baby girl. You have a beautiful baby girl and she was trying to cry before I could even get her out of the womb!"
"Wake up, Jane. Listen to what I am saying." He squeezed my hand and leaned closer. "She stuck her little fist out as soon as I started going in! She has ten fingers, ten toes....and she is much bigger than I thought she would be. The best neonatalogist in town is with her right now. It's going to be fine, girl, it's all going to be fine!"
I have never heard more welcome words!
And that is how little Bonnie Leigh came into this world! Weighing in at 3 pounds 5 ounces, she looked somewhat like a drowned rat. Her skin was translucent; her lungs were severely underdeveloped; but, she was a fighter!!!
She spent 12 days on a respirator, suffering some setbacks. She had jaundice; she lost weight - down to 2 pounds 14 ounces. But, she was more than beautiful to me!
After only 5-1/2 weeks, much sooner than anticipated, she left the hospital. Oh, such a tiny thing she was! But, already plumping up and home before Christmas! It was the beginning of my journey into "Motherhood"...
Bonnie, you were truly a miracle. I knew from the beginning that God had a special purpose for you in this life. Such an auspicious beginning for such a tiny little being....and what a blessing you have been! I am so thankful that God made me your mother....that He gave me a daughter like you!
Happy birthday!!! I love you forever!!!